Freedom For Women
Farah M Saddha ( Activist , Entrepreneur , Author and participant of Women Empowerment principles and United Nations Global Compact )
First Published on New Nation February 2. 2000
When I arrived at the private clinic it was six o clock in the evening I could see my mom’s face which was covered with the darkness of the twilight . Both of us were excited about my Aunt who was in the clinic for the delivery of her first child . As soon as we got into her room we heard the baby’s voice . All my relatives were standing her to see the baby . My aunt was trying to say something to my mom . I heard her asking my mom ‘Is it a boy ? Oh God Is it a boy ?’
Suddenly I lost all my curiosity and charm of coming here . Besides I wanted to ask my aunt ,’Being a mother of a new born baby how can you prefer your baby to be a male ? They all should be equal to you . If you make this distinction at birth how is she going to live with honour , with confidence in her life ?’I couldn’t ask her these questions on that day but today I am writing this essay on behalf of women in Bangladesh who really need to stand against all the inequality they experience from the very beginning of their life , who need to speak against all the social , cultural , economic ,religious and political discrimination they bear all their life . These discriminations against women are true for all over the world . I remember one critic said :privileges as are available .The girl child even as she utters her first cry , will be a disappointment for their parents ,she will quickly begin the process making the best of a bad job by preparing her for her role in life as one who will normally take second place to men first other brothers and father ,later to her husband .( Sicilia np) . Obviously I agree with her opinion .
The majority of Bangladeshi women have similar experiences when they are very young . They eat less that their brothers . They do not go to school and grow up feeling that they are not as important as their brothers . They do not go to school and grow up feelings that they are not as important as their brothers .But why should a woman face these inequalities ? Why should she think that she is an inferior ? The time has come to ask these questions .In Bangladesh women never have any opportunity to answer these questions . At first they need to be aware of their inequalities and should be taught at home that their lives are individual and meaningful . I believe that women as human beings should have the same rights . The mother who thinks herself that she was born for her husband and father teaches her daughter the same way she feels , must change her thoughts if she wants a better future for her daughter . All the women In Bangladesh should at least realise that they are subjected to inequalities and discriminations over the generations .
Writing about the equal rights of women reminds me one of my experiences in my village last summer .I saw a good number of young girls who were suffering from malnutrition . They do not have enough food , clothing , shelter, medical care and education . It reminded me of a writer’s opinion . She said that like Bangladesh the vast majority of the 33.5 billion people who live in the world’s poorest countries lead lives of grinding poverty , unrelenting toil and ignorance . And those who are the poorest , who toil the hardest and the most uneducated are women . Moreover,according to the census taken in 1985 the women’s literacy rate is only 25% . There are often kept away from school to do chores around the houses . I saw girls who were only four or five years old helping their mothers cooking or washing clothes or working in other people’s houses . The girl named Rekha who was working in my grandmother’s home seemed to be nine or ten years old . But when I asked her age Rekha said ,’I do not know when I was born . My mother told me that I was born before a night of a violent storm,’ When I asked her about her education she said that she wanted to go to school .But her mom told her that girls did not need to go to school and they did not have enough money to send her to school . So she was helping her family working in my grandmother’s home .
There are many girls like Rekha whose lives are left behind superstition and ignorance . That village is their country , their world and life .They have not seen the need to know more than their villages . Although the prime minister of Bangladesh is a woman it does not help anything to raise the status of women in the society . I think that the problems of hunger and malnutrition will not be solved unless women have the education , the knowledge and the skills to fully participate in solving them . I strongly support that primary education should be compulsory all over the country . Social organisations like women’s associations should help the poor women of the villages by teaching them , giving them knowledge about health care . Education is the main path for the women in Bangladesh to discover their own life , creativity and wisdom .
Again Marriage which is considered as a sign of adulthood and an institution for sharing and respecting each other is not true for women in Bangladesh .Here over 90% of women marry before the age of 20 because parents consider getting their daughters married as part of their parental responsibilities . As a result many young women are married when they are thirteen or fourteen years old and they bear all the pain and sufferings of early chid pregnancy . Not only that but also these women are generally tortured by their husbands physically and mentally . As they only depend on their husband’s income , they have no place to go except passing days with unhappiness and violence . I really do not agree that the parents should consider that the only duty for their daughters is to arrange their marriage of their daughters . They have lots of other responsibilities . They can send them to schools for building their own career so that they do not need to depend on their husbands . Again many parents do not let their daughters make their own decisions to choose their own bride-grooms . A man can love a woman , he can choose his bride but a women cannot. I believe that a women should have her own rights to control her life and to make important decisions . Her life is only hers . It cannot be dominated by her father or her husband . If a man can love and marry , she can also love a man and marry him because love is equal for everyone in this world . As one feminist wrote‘Young women …you are in my opinion disgracefully ignorant . You have never made discovery of any importance . You have never shaken an empire or led an army into battle .’(Woolf 23)
Like other countries of the world Bangladesh very few women participate in politics and they all come from rich and elite families . One critic in Bangladesh once wrote : Since only a limited number of women contest for elections public offices . The women politicians differ from their male politicians and get less advantage as a female politician . The major constrain on women’s political participation in Bangladesh is the cultural name of Purdah . The seclusion of women and the concept of a separate world for women , which purdah implies , obviously limits women’s participation in politics . While in islam the idea of Umma (community ) is important , women are excluded from any community celebrations . Purdah norms make it difficult for women to get interested in politics , find it hard to move up to the ranks of political officers . ( Jahan 225-480).
The women in Bangladesh should try to fulfil a mission-that is , a country without women’s discrimination and prejudice . They should be ready to sacrifice for women’s liberation and freedom inspires the rest of the women in Bangladesh to take a stand for their right .
Hopefully , the question of equality and freedom for women becomes a matter of universal awareness. This is true for Bangladesh also . Women are now more careful about their education and career . In the villages some organisations are helping women by organising evening schools for them . Bangladesh Government has also raised the legal age of marriage which is now seventeen . I hope that all the people In Bangladesh al least learn to respect their mothers , wives , daughters and women over all .
At the beginning of my essay I have written that my aunt was not pleased with the birth of her baby daughter . She wanted a boy . Coming back from the hospital I could not sleep that night . I was thinking about the little baby whose new life has begun with the curse of her mother . Can we make new world for her ?Let her fly , please !
